Saturday, October 8, 2011

Oh the things children say...or at least mine

I have a friend who is an AWESOME blogger. Her name is Chanell. In fact, I dunno if that's even giving her enough credit for her pure TALENT of writing. She should probably get into authoring real books. Or she could just publish her blog AS a book. Anyway, I would be lying if I said I wasn't a little envious of her skill and natural comedic abilities. ANNNDDD, she's a regular blogger, as in weekly. I'm more like yearly. But I really want to try, because I'm also jealous that she has TONS of entries that are highlighting and recording the lives of her children, and I was good at that with Halle at first when I would write a journal about all her "firsts" and other cute things, but that stopped very abruptly when Bubba showed up. And he has nothing. I always swore I wouldn't be "that" parent. But people, I'm telling ya, it's true! More than one kid and it's pure survival mode at times. Forget making everything equal.

I digress.

So today I'm highlighting a lot of the funny things I don't want to forget that my kiddos do and say. With a much longer list to come. Hopefully.

Halle says the darndest things list (and stories that go along them):
1. I scold Bubba, he cries, he's on his way to his room: "Ohh come here little boy" with arms outstretched and ready to hug him
2. I am chopping celery: "What's that?" It's celery. "Oh. And it has no preservatives?" True story. She's three.
3. Bubba's making a mess in the kids room. "Bubba! Don't get that out! I just got done pickin this stuff up!" Like mother, like daughter. Scary.
4. We sometimes ask Halle what color we are. We want to raise politically correct children ya know. (HA) SOoo what color is mommy? "Golden." That's going on 'other' from here on out under 'race/ethnicity.'
5. When we first potty-trained Hal, I told her to tell me when she goes #2 so I can come wipe her and avoid any skid marks, if ya know what I'm sayin, and also avoid her getting any on her hands. So even now, over a year later, every time Halle's done, she yells, "Mom! I don't want to get poop on my hands!"
6. Prayers. One night Halle really wanted to go big, so she opened her eyes and started looking around her room and naming all the things she saw during her "thank you's." It's tender to hear your 3 year old thank Heavenly Father for toys and bunk beds. And everyone she knows. And for "our jobs."
7. "I am a Child of God" is a favorite church song at our house. According to Halle, Heavenly Father has given us an "early" home.
8. "Dad, Bubba said we need to go to the Michael Jordan store and get some new Jordans." Oh ya? (Halle responds in a whisper) "And I want some Michael Jordans too" What color? "Pink."
9. The cougar fight song is kind of a difficult song. Especially for 2 and 3 year olds. "On we'll go to vanquish the foe" = "Awn-a-maw-na vafafa foe"
10. "Hoopa-loop" Hula Hoop.
11. Everything at our house ends in y, ey, or ie or has been converted to a compound word. Examples: "bathy bath," "churchy church," "diapey dipe," "nappy nap," "lunchy lunch..." you get the gist.

Bubba REALLY does say the darndest things list (and more stories):
1. "Hudda one" (OTHER one)
2. "Forsey" and "Hootball" (Horsey and football...apparently F and H are very confusing letters in the English language)
3. Whenever Bubba stinks and needs his diaper changed, he asks "What kind poop is it?" meaning he wants to know what color and consistency. Yes, he's DEFINITELY a boy, and it starts young people. Sometimes it's followed up with "Is it peanut butta poop?" If you heard his lil voice say it, it's really actually cute.
4. Lately, everything is "I don't wantoo." Or of course, "No."
5. When Bubba knows he's done something he shouldn't, he comes out and in his cutest lil angel voice will say, "I wuh you, Mommy."
6. Bubba has "ebras" on his diapers, not to be confused with zebras.
7. EVERY time we see a BYU logo or even just a Y, ESPECIALLY in the car, the excitement is uncontained: "WOOK! (pointing) I SEE DA Y! I SEE DA BYU COUGAS!" He is not brainwashed. He comes by it naturally.
8. The other night, everyone BUT Bubba was in the family room. We hear Bubba shooting his bball in his over-the-door nerf hoop in the kid's room saying "Oh c'maawwn!" Rebound, shoot. "Oh c'maaawwwnn!" Apparently Mike Hall was playing defense on him. Or the MWC refs didn't cut him any slack.
9. Bubba is very religious. He likes to say prayers in the middle of a rowdy BYU crowd at Lavell Edwards stadium. Typically right now it goes: "Henly Fodder, eh day, (maybe) eh daddy, n mommy, n bubba (maybe Hawee), eh Chwist, AMEN." The fans sitting next to Mike really enjoyed that.
10. Mike and I call each other babe. Nothing else. It's obviously pretty bad when you hear BOTH your children calling EACH OTHER babe.
11. Diggy used to try to gank food out of the kids' hands cuz he knew he could. So the kids, logically, are little suspicious of him when they get food and are walking around the house eating it. Bubba is VERY protective of his food (look at his cheeks!). It doesn't matter WHERE he is, if he has food, and Diggy is ANYwhere in close proximity, "NO! Diggy! Get houtta here!"
12. I lovingly call Diggy names sometimes. One day, I was outside cooking on the grill and I told Bubba and Halle to get Mike. Halle opened the door and Bubba yelled, "Come here little idiot!"
13. When Bubba shoots on his hoop, which is a few hours daily (no exaggeration), it's common to hear, "Aw, good shot." "Oh yeah! Gimme five!" "Oh good try." "Almost!" You can tell how encouraging WE are, huh?
OTHER VERY POPULAR phrases of my two-year-old Bubba:
"I go pway baskee-ball, k?" "I go Daddy's office, pway baskee-ball BYU cougas." "Daddy, wook (pointing to his clothes), Michael Jordan!" "Kwocks" (Crocs). "Right der" (pointing at ANYthing). "Fwoot nack" (fruit snack). "Yogrit" (yogurt). "Kwispie Wice Ceyo" (Rice Crispies). "I see da watah!" (ANY water, fountain, lake...) "Happy der-day" (Happy BIRTHDAY) "Gimme squeeze hug."

Maybe some of these made you laugh or smile like we did, and DO, even daily, here at the Hall house. Maybe they're kinda simple n boring. But it's life here with Halle and Bubba. They won't say these things, in this way, forever. So now it's documented. Check.